COMPLEX POST-TRAUMATIC STRESS DISORDER
Complex Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder is crippling. Flashbacks of Donna's trauma, of the assault she endured were occurring during the day and in her sleep. Each time they happened she was magically transported back into the room where the assault happened. There was no escape from this and no end to the torment. Her situation was made worse because of the anger she was carrying, not towards the person who attacked but because of the situation she'd been left in. There was no blame in her mind or heart towards her attacker and still isn't - psychosis can't carry blame. Many people around her can't get their heads around that! It is what it is. There was this vicious cycle: the more flashbacks that occurred, the more fearful she became. The more fear felt, the more the anger built. The more angry she was, the more flashbacks there were. Life became hell. Functioning even at a remedial level was difficult at best, for Donna was also struggling to rebuild her lost memory. Thankfully she has taken control of her CPTSD. It no longer owns her - she owns it - and is no longer defined by it's rules, dragged down to its level and crippled by it. Having learnt to cope, to recognise the signs and to win through with an inner strength she had no idea existed by using coping tools received during therapy - and it took two rounds of intense therapy for her to regain control - she can now crack on with life. Writing has given her the gift of freeing her mind to enable this. Through it she's gained confidence and emerged from the shadows once more.